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THE LOVE OF TWO SISTERS

Love is a relationship that we all experience in some form and at some level throughout our lives. There are different types of love: one being the special love or bond between the siblings of a family. Margaret Mead, the anthropologist wrote “sister is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are grown, it becomes the strongest relationship.”

Someone else has said that “growing up with a sister can be trying at times. They get into your stuff, can be weird and troublesome-but having a sister means you have a friend for life. They will always be there for you, no matter the circumstances”.

Such could describe the sisters, Merry LeShane and Donna Griffin. Although there is a 12-year difference in their ages, that acorn of bonding planted in early life has grown to an oak-sized love for one another as they have matured. This is their story.

Merry and Donna were born in Memphis and into a family experiencing the trying times of the depression years. The parents understood hard work but considered a high school education as sufficient for life. Girls were expected to get married after graduation from high school and create their own families. This is what Merry and Donna did. Merry married and moved to Miami. She had one son. Donna married and stayed in Memphis. She has 2 daughters and 4 grandsons.

However, both Merry and Donna had higher ambitions. Merry graduated from the University of Miami with a B.S. and Masters in Education and Counseling and worked 25 years with the Miami Public School System. Donna waited until her daughters were in school and fulfilled her dream of becoming a nurse. She spent most of her career in cardiovascular ICU at St. Francis Hospital. Donna says she loved taking care of patients and shunned any management positions. She was happy when her 2 daughters followed in her footsteps and became nurses as well.

Due to the age difference, Merry and Donna were not close growing up. With Merry living in Miami, their time together was infrequent. However, when Merry visited Memphis, she and Donna would spend an entire day at Goldsmiths Department Store. There were also retreats when Donna visited Merry in the cabin she owned in Blue Ridge, GA. Donna recalls that these visits occurred 2 or 3 times a year and they just enjoyed getting to know each other and having lots of fun.

When Merry and Donna’s parents became older and besieged with health problems, it fell upon Donna to be their caregiver. Although frequent phone calls kept Merry in the loop, she felt she was needed to help with her parent’s care. So, in 1997, she retired from teaching snd moved back to Memphis. “Merry was such a blessing as I still had a family and a full-time job. We divided up the needs. I continued with their medical care and Merry with their finances” recalls Donna.

Merry has loved to dance since the age of 5. When she moved back to Memphis, she joined the McWherter’s “Steppin’ Out Dancers”, dancing with the group for 18 years and until her back said “no more”. Merry was accepted as a close family member by Donna’s children. When Merry’s son died unexpectedly in 2014, Donna’s sons-in-law took vacation time to go to Miami to take care of his estate, arriving back in Memphis with a big bird, a McCaw named Paco in tow.

Merry and Donna began their research on retirement communities when their parents began having severe health problems. They found care to be extremely fragmented and expensive. Merry had attended several events at Kirby Pines and learned about Life Care offered to all residents. When Donna’s husband, Jim, began showing signs of dementia, they both decided that Kirby was the right choice for them. Merry moved to Kirby in September, 2017. Donna and her husband, Jim moved in 2 weeks later. Because of Jim’s declining health, he had experiences with Job’s Way, Rehabilitation Unit and eventually Hospice. Donna says, “we were able to visit and stay in the room with him from 6 a.m. to 10 p.m. and he received excellent care in all 3 areas”.

Both Merry and Donna are very involved in activities at Kirby. Merry volunteers in the Blossom Shop and attends the Book Baggers. “She has cared for everybody’s dog or cat in I Wing”, says Donna. Donna is currently serving on the Advisory Committee, loves line dancing, enjoys the exercising opportunities and the Book Baggers. You can see them in the Bistro having breakfast together or eating at the same table in the dining room at night. They are almost inseparable as they go to the same hairdresser, nail salon, doctor and grocery store.

The love these 2 sisters have for each other and others is apparent. Their positive attitudes and friendly dispositions represent the caring and love available to each of us as members of the Kirby family.

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident, Kirby Pines

♥ A SERVANT’S HEART ♥

What motivates someone to provide an act of kindness to others? Could it be the good feeling about self that is the reward? Or, perhaps it is something GOD plants in the heart of someone so that others in need can be served? The latter explanation probably best fits Shirley Anderson, who unquestionably spends many hours each day volunteering and helping others.

Perhaps Shirley’s desire to help others came about as the result of her humble beginning. The youngest of six children, her family struggled to survive. As a result of financial circumstances, Shirley was born in the John Gaston Hospital, the city hospital, on January 23,1935. Shirley remembers, “our family lived in a ‘run-down’ shack in Ellendale (suburb of Memphis). Our house burned to the ground when I was five years old and our family moved to Memphis and I have lived here ever since”. Because both parents worked, Shirley spent most of her summers at South Side Park where she became interested in many sports, including tennis which she continues to play occasionally.

Shirley attended A. B. Hill Elementary and won the school’s spelling bee contest while in 7th grade. She attended South Side High School where she was a cheerleader for three years. “I had a great time in high school and was honored to be voted Best Dancer and Most Popular Girl my senior year”.

Graduating from high school in 1953, Shirley could not afford to attend college. So, she found employment at MLG&W. She became involved in a sponsored bowling team that played at Southern Lanes. There, she met a handsome, young man who was working his way through college. The man was James William “Jim” Anderson and they were married in September of 1959. Shirley continued working at MLGW until motherhood came along. The first daughter, Leslie was born in 1961, the second, Tracy in 1962. “We got the shock of our lives in 1965 when I gave birth to twin boys, James Christopher “Jim” and William Timothy “Tim”. The doctor didn’t even know I was expecting twins. Four children in less than five years, I was quite busy for a few years” says Shirley.

The family moved to Germantown in 1971 and Shirley remained a “stay-at-home mom” until 1975 when she became employed as school secretary at Farmington Elementary. She stayed there until the last child graduated from college. By that time the daughters, Leslie and Tracy had married and the grandchildren started arriving. Shirley’s husband, Jim, was then Superintendent of Shelby County Schools, an appointed job which he held from 1985-1997. During this time, Shirley was able to devote time to and enjoy her four grandchildren. “I did a lot of volunteering work at church and Ronald McDonald House”. Jim also liked serving others and for two years they spent every Monday morning, in all kind of weather, serving breakfast to the homeless in a park in mid-town. “I felt so blessed to be able to do this” says Shirley.

Since moving to Kirby Pines in August 2014, Shirley has been constantly busy. Not long after moving to Kirby Pines, Jim began showing signs of declining health and Shirley devoted most of her time to caring for him. Jim’s move to the health care facilities here at Kirby motivated her to see the need for her services in those areas. Since Jim’s death two years ago, Shirley has devoted countless hours to activities for the residents there. In a more public light, Shirley is currently serving on the Advisory Committee, having formerly served as Wing Leader. You can see her in every resident entertainment venue, in the Blossom Shop and transporting residents from the health areas to Vespers every Thursday night. You might see her filing music in the “music closet” or assisting with memorial services. “I’m happy to transport or run errands for anyone who needs help”, says Shirley. Such a statement comes from a true servant!

Shirley is currently a member of Germantown Church of Christ. She was baptized at age 17 and has consistently been involved in all church activities. In Shirley’s own words, “I, like most people, have had hard times in my life, but GOD has gotten me through them. I believe He always will. Since Jim’s death, GOD has led me to many great people and so many opportunities to help others here at Kirby Pines. This is a great place to live. I thank GOD for blessing me with these opportunities and for all the others who serve in so many ways”.

Shirley Anderson is certainly an example of someone with a true servant’s heart. She, like many others at Kirby Pines provide in excess of 30,000 hours of volunteer service each year. We are truly blessed to have so many residents who devote their talents to making life better at Kirby Pines and so fortunate that Shirley and her husband, Jim, decided to make Kirby Pines their forever home.

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident, Kirby Pines

HAPPY AND JOYFUL

Nancy and Bill Douglas have had a successful life and marriage, recently celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. As faithful Christians, they believe that the greatest achievement and joy of their lives is “having raised three Christian children who have, in turn, raised five Christian grandchildren.”

Bill and Nancy moved with their dog “Chip” to Kirby Pines in November 2017 from Germantown, where they had lived their entire married life. They first met in 1957 when Nancy’s brother invited his friend Bill Douglas to their home to meet one of Nancy’s friends. Well, Nancy decided that she was “the one” for Bill. Nancy and Bill married on June 14, 1959.

Bill Douglas was born in Memphis in 1936. He attended Snowden Jr. and Central High Schools. He graduated from Memphis State University with a degree in Sales and Advertising and went to work immediately selling real estate. He first worked in sales of houses but later worked in commercial real estate selling such things as office buildings and hotels. Bill was recognized in “The Million Dollar Club” for having sold that amount in a year. He retired at age 65 after 42 years with Cooper Realty.

Nancy Pickering Douglas was born in Germantown in 1938. Nancy says she was blessed to be born into a Christian family. Being the only girl with two brothers, she became “a Daddy’s girl”. Her father’s premature death just weeks before her graduation from high school put Nancy into a deep depression for some time. Nancy attended Germantown High School and Memphis State University for one year. However, the non-academic world beckoned and so she was hired by MLG&W to work in the Records Department. When she “caught” Bill Douglas her life “took on a happy and joyful experience.”

Following their marriage, Bill and Nancy moved to Germantown. Their first son, William, was born 1 ½ years later. Sadly, 18 months later, an infant daughter, Elizabeth Ann, died after 3 days. “God needed her”, says Nancy but she experienced another period of depression with this loss. However, one year later, they were thrilled when their 2nd son, Joe, was born healthy and happy. They were equally thrilled when a daughter, Nancy Anne, was born 18 months later. Raising 3 children was a lively but pleasurable experience for Nancy. She says “The few bumps we had were easy to resolve”. Nancy, fortunately, was able to be “a stay at home mom” which allowed her to be involved in all the children’s activities, including the PTA. A testimony to Nancy’s loving role as a mother was presented to her on her 80th birthday. A book entitled “Making Memories” contained photos and quotes of love, appreciation and remembering fun times from her children, son and daughters-in-law and grandchildren. “We always had time for family vacations as well as just the two of us. Bill’s career afforded us the opportunity to have so many wonderful trips and interesting destinations”, says Nancy.

Although Nancy was busy as a homemaker she also was very involved in the Suburban Garden Club and Germantown Women’s Club. Bill became active in the Germantown Civic Club, the Optimist Club, Leadership Memphis, the Boy Scouts and served as President and Board Member of the Germantown Horse Show. Bill coached Little League, football and basketball, involving himself in all of his children’s activities. He also loved to fish, hunt and play golf in his “spare time”. At St. George’s Episcopal Church, Bill helped start the first Adult Bible Class, served on a committee to train and direct the Acolytes and was Chairman of the Ushers. Nancy and Bill are now members of Faith Anglican Church where Bill serves as an Usher and Nancy helps with Oblations.

Since moving to Kirby Pines, Bill has been involved in the Garden and Ham’ateur Clubs. In 2018, Bill and Nancy took on the role of Mr. & Mrs. Santa Claus in the annual Christmas Eve Program at Kirby Pines. Nancy continues to play golf frequently. Most importantly, she has quietly assumed the role as a helper to many residents who need assistance. When Bill and Nancy moved to Kirby Pines, they became next-door neighbors to 99-year-old resident, Virginia Granger. Nancy says “Virginia became one of the best friends I ever had. We loved each other immediately. She truly blessed my life”. Unfortunately, Virginia’s recent death has left a big void in Nancy’s life.

However, both Bill and Nancy have stated that their lives continue to be blessed since moving to Kirby Pines. “This is a joyful time in our lives. We have met and feel so close to so many of the residents. Now, we have a much larger and wonderful family of beautiful people. We have always loved people and wanted to help others”, say Nancy and Bill. Because of their personalities and helping nature, Bill and Nancy Douglas are a wonderful “fit” for our Kirby Pines family and are an example for all of us.

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident, Kirby Pines