I’m intrigued by bumper stickers. I sometimes get dangerously close to a car in order to see what is being proclaimed on the bumper sticker.
A recent sticker got my immediate attention, “Kiss an artist today.” That’s easy for me. My wife and my daughter are artists.
But the thought is expansive. I began to reflect. I remembered a story John Powell told about two priests who experienced a rich and rewarding friendship. They struggled together through the wilderness of long seminary training and worked together in a community ministry.
Then one of the two friends was hit by a car and killed in front of their residence. The other knelt at the side of his old friend, gently cradled the brother’s head on his arm, and before all the people who had gathered blurted out, “Don’t die! You can’t die! I never told you I loved you.”
It could happen to any one of us, but it need not. Before this day ends, do two things. One, even if you have to call them on the phone or write them a note, tell a person you have not told recently that you love them. Two, for a person you are always telling you love, do something that will validate your words.
Drive carefully, but pay attention to those bumper stickers. Just today I read this one: Don’t believe everything you think.
Describe yourself in five words: Loving, caring, respectful, honest and helpful.
What is something you are proud of: Being part of the Kirby Pines Environmental Services Team.
What do you do for fun: Perform on stage with my band.
Do you have any hobbies or interests: Playing guitar.
What is your favorite food: Chicken. Favorite song:The Thrill Is Gone by B.B. King.
What is your favorite thing about your job: I get along with everybody.
What would you like people to know about you: That I am very kind and easy to get along with.
Rudy exemplifies the values that Kirby stands for integrity, patience, kindness and community. He is never self-serving and can always be counted on to go above and beyond to provide the best care for our residents. He treats everyone like family and has never meet a stranger. My department and Kirby are proud to have Rudy on our team.
– Jada Mullins, Director of Environmental Services
A beautiful fourteen-year-old girl with brown hair and lovely blue eyes enrolls in high school and meets a seventeen year old handsome young man who is President of the junior high school class. They fall in love and elope as soon as he graduates, and she has completed her sophomore year in high school.
Today, that couple, Geneva and Joe Jackson are still deeply in love and will celebrate their sixty-seventh wedding anniversary in May. When asked what attracted them to each other, Geneva said, “I just liked the way he looked.” Joe said, “It was her beautiful eyes.” This is their story:
Geneva Gilliland and Joe Jackson were both born to farming families and lived in neighboring counties of West Tennessee. Geneva was born in 1939 in a community called “Frog Jump” in Crockett County, the last of five girls. “I was supposed to be a boy and I had already been named ‘John Wayne’. I think my father was so disappointed he wanted to pinch my head off,” says Geneva. Geneva laughs when she says this and relates that she had a very happy childhood and a loving family. She was given the opportunity to study piano, played piano at church and for a quartet that sang every Saturday morning on WTRV in Ripley, Tennessee.
Joe was born in 1936 in the “Nankipoo” community, Lauderdale County, completing a family of four boys and one girl. They would later move to Halls, Tennessee when Joe’s father bought a combined grocery store and service station. Geneva and Joe’s families were members of the Methodist Church. It was at a church gathering that they actually first saw each other. Both would attend high school in Halls, Tennessee; Joe became President of his senior class and their romance blossomed.
Geneva 1957
It was 1955, at the end of the school year, when Geneva and Joe decided to elope. With two friends accompanying them, they traveled to Holly Springs, Mississippi and were married in the study of a Methodist minister. The next day, they traveled by train to Flint, Michigan. Joe’s parents had moved there previously, and Geneva and Joe made their home with them for one year. During that time, Geneva completed requirements for a high school diploma.
Returning to Memphis in 1957, Geneva worked as a nursing assistant in the OB-GYN area of Baptist Hospital. She completed a laboratory course and was employed in an OB/GYN physician’s office for six years. When their first son Tim was born, Geneva became a stay-at-home mom welcoming son Robin five years later.
Joe was first employed by Purity Products, a candy wholesale company. He completed a William R. Moore and Dale Carnegie course, then decided to start his own business, Jackson Vending Company. Geneva managed the office and counted what she called “dirty money” in the literal sense! After ten years, the business was sold and Joe bought a Western Auto store in Trenton, Tennessee. During the six years there, the area suffered a tremendous flood when several area dams broke. According to Geneva, “It was an awful time as property and lives were lost. Business and interest rates were bad, and we decided to move back to Memphis.”
Returning to Memphis, Joe again began a vending company, Spartain Automatic, which he managed for twelve years before selling. Joe’s last job was in Public Relations for Car Wash USA, a business started by their son Tim.
Following retirement, the Jackson’s took two cruises and enjoyed their family life. Both played golf and were active in church. Joe also played baseball while Geneva loved singing in groups, cooking, and antiquing.
Joe 1957
According to Geneva, “In 2009, Joe and I started looking for a place that was like home. We looked at three other places and didn’t like any of them” Laughingly, she adds, “We had known Nancy Pence a long time, even before she wed George! Knowing Nancy and others who lived here and working with Pat Mills in Marketing—this was our ticket to buy in.”
In 2016, Joe was diagnosed with prostate cancer. After eight weeks of radiation, he was cured. However, the need to make a change resulted in the decision to move to Kirby Pines in July, 2017.
Geneva assists with the memorials held at Kirby Pines, cares for Joe and plans to sing with the Entertainers Chorus. When asked what she likes best about Kirby Pines, Geneva responded, “I like everything (except COVID)! I especially like being near all of our church friends from Christ United Methodist Church who live here. I love the atmosphere and the fact that we are all brothers and sisters in our Lord.” Their two sons live close by, and the four grandchildren and seven great grandchildren make for frequent happy family time.
Joe and Geneva Jackson are a unique couple. To know them is to love them and they seem to love everyone. Geneva has an infectious laugh which is easily identifiable. Joe entertains us by mimicking Chinese and telling tall tales. Both Geneva and Joe hope they will be together for a long time, in love, even into eternity.
April is Occupational Therapy Month! But what IS Occupational Therapy (OT)? In simple terms, OT teaches you how to adapt. If your ability to perform your everyday responsibilities is ever impacted due to an illness or injury, occupational therapy can help. Those everyday responsibilities may have included going to work in earlier years, but now it may include attending exercise classes, venturing out on the walking trails, or participating in social events like the Lunch Bunch. OT is a branch of skilled therapy that helps people regain independence in all areas of their lives, and helps with barriers that impact a person’s emotional, social, and/or physical needs. So, even if you’re retired, occupational therapy can still be beneficial for you!
OTs use their knowledge of the structure and function of the human body and the effects of illness and injury to increase your involvement in daily activities. OTs teach individuals how to manage stress and fatigue and prevent re-injury. They are also the experts in home safety and fall prevention and can advise on environmental modifications or improvements.
During therapy sessions, OTs will also work with the wellness and activities department to determine the best programs after your therapy is completed. This may include specific exercise classes and events, personal training, home exercise programs, or a combination of these services. Therapy partners with other departments to ensure you are engaging in the most appropriate and effective exercises and programming possible. For example, if you were receiving occupational therapy for trouble with grip strength, after being discharged, your therapist may recommend you start attending Pinecone Painters or Hobby Pines Group to continue to challenge and focus on exercising your hand and grip strength.
Brittany Austin, National Director of Health and Wellness, Functional Pathways
Learn when to keep moving through exercise pain and when to stop.
By Camille Noe Pagán
Exercise is crucial if you have arthritis. But knowing just how much activity to do when you’re hurting can be tricky. Research shows that moderate activity can help prevent the progression of arthritis and improve overall function. But while mild muscle soreness after a workout is normal, sharp pain during or immediately after can signal injury. And sometimes simply the fear of pain can keep you from wanting to do any kind of exercise. Here’s how to determine when it’s OK to work through exercise pain – and when it’s not.
If you have mild to moderate pain in a specific joint area before you work out: Some mild pain is typical when you first start to move, but after a few minutes you’ll usually start to feel better, says A. Lynn Millar, PhD, a professor of physical therapy at Winston Salem State University. “Our joints and muscles get nutrition through movement,” she explains. “With some movement, you’ll improve the lubrication and circulation around that joint.” Start with some gentle range of motion movements and if that feels OK, progress to some low-impact activity like walking.
If you have moderate to severe pain in a specific joint area before you work out: Focus on a different area for a day or two. If your knees hurt, decrease the intensity. If the pain becomes worse, then stop the lower body moves and work your upper body instead. “Continuing to put pressure on a joint when it’s especially sore could contribute to joint damage, so it’s best to ease up for a while,” says physical therapist Richard Kassler, supervisor at New York University Hospital for Joint Diseases.
If you have moderate to severe joint pain during exercise: Stop immediately. “Most people with arthritis can work through mild pain safely. But if you’re experiencing a lot of pain while you exercise, even if you’re not doing a particularly joint-taxing workout, it may be a sign that you have inflammation in the joint, or even joint damage that requires treatment,” says Kassler.
If you consistently have joint pain (not muscle pain) after exercise: Switch to a workout that puts less pressure on your joints. “If you need an elaborate brace or have to pop ibuprofen constantly, it’s a pretty good sign that your activity is too hard on your joints. Swimming, water aerobics and biking are all good options for people with joint pain.
If you occasionally have moderate to severe joint pain the day after you work out: Cut back on the intensity of your workout. Take a day off, then doing a shorter, less strenuous workout. If your pain still doesn’t let up, switch to a less intense form of exercise, such as water aerobics.
Mary Hand’s favorite quote, ”No Pain, No Gain. That’s Insane. Listen to your body.” Our Arthritis Foundation exercise classes in the pool and in the PAC are good for everyone whether they have arthritis or not. Please consider joining us. See the schedule for times and places.
Peter Cottontail will certainly be busy around Kirby Pines once again. The early timing of Easter this year will not stop him from ensuring that spring flowers are in bloom throughout the community.
Our “Annual” Easter Egg Hunt is back! After a two-year rest this year’s egg hunt should be filled with the laughter and excitement of grandchildren, great grandchildren and even a few great, great grandchildren as they collect the hidden treasures Peter has left for them. Hopefully, you have helped him along the way by dyeing a few Easter eggs yourself.
Not to be out done by the Easter Bunny, our culinary team is planning a wonderful Easter Brunch. Of course, your family and friends are welcomed to join you. Simply call Skye Sanders to make a reservation. I am sure they’ll enjoy the food and company. Who knows, Peter Cottontail may even leave a hidden surprise to remind your guests of how special Kirby Pines truly is to everyone.
April brings to us not only the rebirth of Christ, but also the opportunity to remind ourselves how fortunate we are, as we read and learn of so many countries struggling at this time. So invite your families and friends to come visit and see for themselves why Kirby Pines is such a beautiful place to live.
Michael Escamilla, Executive Director, Kirby Pines
Paul’s “Hymn of Love” (First Corinthians 13) is one of the best-known sections of Scripture. In all my years of ministry there have been few weddings in which I have not referred to this great love reflection. When thoughts and reflections are being connected with love, none can do better than to read and spend some time with this “Hymn of Love”.
“But have not love” is an attention getting phrase that occurs three times in the first three verses of the hymn. “If I speak in the tongues of men and angels — but have not love.”
“If I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and knowledge, and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains — but have not love.”
“If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be burned — but have not love.” Paul closes his last “but have not love” with the dogmatic word, “I gain nothing.” He makes his point clearly; nothing is of any use if love is missing. Bereft of love, we become less than we are as humans.
After my sermon, in a conference where I was preaching, people were in a line greeting me. I saw a woman “hanging back.” I knew she wanted a bit more time than the usual greeting and thank you. I was so moved by her affirmation and self-introduction that I spontaneously hugged her. You would have thought I had given a glass of water to a person dying of thirst, or a $1,000 to a penniless beggar. Her face was aglow. “Thank you,” she exclaimed, and added, “Nobody hugs me anymore.”
She told me more: the loss of her husband 10 years before, her children scattered and she was now living alone. She doesn’t get any hugs.
If we know we are loved — and hugging helps us to know — we can bear anything. But if we have not love, we become less than human.
It is easy to grow careless of the ones we are supposed to love. We become thoughtless of the little things that keep love alive. So we don’t hug as much as we should. We don’t speak kind and loving words to our spouses. We take each other for granted, and to take another for granted is to make them less than human.
Words and actions can wound us, but so can no words and no action. Indifference, disregard, neglect — these are the painful bullets that penetrate our hearts and bring emotional death. These deaths are silent. We don’t see them because we are not looking — we’re not listening. The ears and eyes of our hearts are closed to those around us — sometimes even to those we love.
Of all that we must be intentional about, love is paramount.
“The world’s most famous and popular language is music.”
Music is medicine. Music has been shown to boost the immune system, reduce stress, build self-confidence, improve learning, enhance physical exercise, reduce blood pressure, decrease heart rate, reduce anxiety, bring back memories, and manage moods, just to name a few of its benefits. Music has also been shown to help improve sleep quality, especially in older adults.
So, why are there all these positive benefits? Dopamine is released when the brain hears comfortable music (think classical, not heavy metal). The body feels at ease and can begin to relax. We can then connect with positive memories, and we feel more peaceful and engaged with the world.
I think it’s safe to say that most of us enjoy listening to music, and it’s common to listen to our favorite tunes as we drive, clean the house, or go for a walk. As we just learned, listening to music can have a much bigger impact than just helping to pass the time.
Here are a few different ways to reap just a few of the benefits of music:
Listen to New Music.
We tend to listen to the same music, or at least the same genre of music, that we did in our teens and 20s. New music challenges the brain in a way that old music doesn’t. It might not feel pleasurable at first, but unfamiliarity forces the brain to struggle to understand the new sound. Try listening to a different type of music than what you are used to or try listening to music your kids or grandkids enjoy.
Turn on Ambient Noise for Creativity.
If you have an important project you are working on or need to boost creativity, try listening to ambient noise (like white noise) instead. This can help to boost creativity. It sounds counterintuitive, but according to a Journal of Consumer Research study, a moderate noise volume makes processing more difficult, which in turn will promote abstract processing, which leads to higher creativity. When we struggle to process our thoughts, we turn to more creative ways to make sense of the world.
Give Classical Music a Try.
Classical music can improve visual attention. Studies have shown that those who listened to classical music showed better signs of visual attention than those who listened to white noise or silence.
Move with the Music.
Music helps us move. Throw on your favorite tunes the next time you exercise. It can help distract you, drown out any thoughts of fatigue or boredom, and even encourage you to speed up or go a little bit longer. Music clearly has a positive effect on both the brain and the body. You may find the addition of music can have a positive impact on your pain management, motivation, and mental clarity. Our therapy team at Kirby Pines can bring music into your rehabilitation experience. The next time you are sitting or working in silence, turn on your favorite radio station, ask Alexa to “play your favorite song” or pick a playlist from Spotify. There is an endless supply of musical options at your fingertips – take advantage and enjoy! For more information on the benefits of music or to learn more about music therapy and how it can benefit you, please contact the Functional Pathways Therapy Team.
Where words fail, music speaks.
Brittany Austin, National Director of Health and Wellness, Functional Pathways
Studies show that physical activity can reduce pain and improve function, mood, and quality of life for adults with arthritis. Physical activity is also important for the management of other chronic conditions that are common among adults with arthritis, such as diabetes, heart disease, and obesity.
Structured physical activity programs are proven to reduce symptoms and teach participants how to safely increase their physical activity to manage arthritis and other chronic conditions. Here are ten steps to help you get started and keep your exercise program going:
Find an activity you enjoy. You’ll be more likely to stick with it.
Treat workouts like commitments. Block out time on your calendar to let people know you’re unavailable.
Think like an active person. An active person thinks of ways to be active.
Make everyday activities count. Pushing a grocery cart, strolling at the mall, walking the dog and doing housework all have benefits.
Find a workout partner. Another person or group can make activities more enjoyable and help hold you accountable.
Find excuses to walk. Take a walk to your neighbor’s instead of calling.
Aim for 4,000 steps. Walking eases pain, and a recent study found that 4,000 steps a day is enough to boost longevity.
Stand up. It eases stiffness, reduces disease risk and can prolong your life.
Join a group activity. There are several chances at Kirby Pines, like yoga stretch, sit-n-stand exercise, water aerobics or line dancing.
Be mindful of pain. Some muscle aches after exercise is normal, but if pain lasts beyond two hours, do less or modify the activity.
Take advantage of the many opportunities here at Kirby Pines to stay active and physically fit. Discover miles of walking trails outside and inside. Visit the Oasis to use the equipment or to join a water aerobics class. Find your exercise class in the PAC or at home on the channel 2.1. Consult with your doctor if you need physical therapy to get started. And in a few weeks, reward yourself with a new pair of walking shoes or water bottle for sticking with your program.
“It isn’t any of our business, is it, Lord?” A little girl with a tender conscience asked this question in her evening prayer. She had seen a poor needy man on the street that day. “Oh, Mama,” she had said, “let’s help him.” The mother had answered, “Come along, dear. It isn’t any of our business.”
That night, when the little girl had said, “Now I lay me down to sleep,” she added, “Oh God, bless that poor man on the comer.” And then remembering her mother’s words that day, she added, “But really, it isn’t any of our business, is it, Lord?”
Unknowingly the little girl expressed a tragic fact. Many of us grow up conditioned by the feeling that the world and the people about us are none of our business. How untrue! Recall Dickens’ Christmas Carol and be haunted by those words of Jacob Marley’s Ghost. “Business! Mankind was my business. The common welfare was my business Charity, mercy, forbearance and benevolence were all my business. The dealings of my trade were but a drop in the water in the comprehensive ocean of my business!”
Everyman is our business. What happens to the person next door, down the street, across town, yes, even beyond the ocean is our business. We too easily forget one of the clearest words of Jesus, “Inasmuch as you did it unto the least of these you did it unto me.”
At our age, living in a community like Kirby Pines, it is easy to seclude ourselves, to shut off from others. We even think “other peoples’ lives are none of my business.” The fact is others are our business, and our setting gives us opportunity to take care of business by genuinely caring for one another.
Because we are “retired,” or at an age that has moved us from a former “active” life, does not relieve us the responsibility of caring. To be sure, there are needs in our community and we can focus our caring locally. But our attention must be broader. I suggest we listen to the news to keep us sensitive to the needs of the world, thus our praying can be focused. And most of us can contribute financially as well as pray. I am convinced that praying and contributing financially to causes that are serving the world is a means of grace that enables us to be more purposefully Kingdom People.
Kirby Pines, a sister community of The Farms at Bailey Station, is part of the family of LifeCare Communities of Retirement Companies of America. For more information, visit retirementcompanies.com
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