Resident Spotlight

 

♥ A SERVANT’S HEART ♥

What motivates someone to provide an act of kindness to others? Could it be the good feeling about self that is the reward? Or, perhaps it is something GOD plants in the heart of someone so that others in need can be served? The latter explanation probably best fits Shirley Anderson, who unquestionably spends many hours each day volunteering and helping others.

Perhaps Shirley’s desire to help others came about as the result of her humble beginning. The youngest of six children, her family struggled to survive. As a result of financial circumstances, Shirley was born in the John Gaston Hospital, the city hospital, on January 23,1935. Shirley remembers, “our family lived in a ‘run-down’ shack in Ellendale (suburb of Memphis). Our house burned to the ground when I was five years old and our family moved to Memphis and I have lived here ever since”. Because both parents worked, Shirley spent most of her summers at South Side Park where she became interested in many sports, including tennis which she continues to play occasionally.

Shirley attended A. B. Hill Elementary and won the school’s spelling bee contest while in 7th grade. She attended South Side High School where she was a cheerleader for three years. “I had a great time in high school and was honored to be voted Best Dancer and Most Popular Girl my senior year”.

Graduating from high school in 1953, Shirley could not afford to attend college. So, she found employment at MLG&W. She became involved in a sponsored bowling team that played at Southern Lanes. There, she met a handsome, young man who was working his way through college. The man was James William “Jim” Anderson and they were married in September of 1959. Shirley continued working at MLGW until motherhood came along. The first daughter, Leslie was born in 1961, the second, Tracy in 1962. “We got the shock of our lives in 1965 when I gave birth to twin boys, James Christopher “Jim” and William Timothy “Tim”. The doctor didn’t even know I was expecting twins. Four children in less than five years, I was quite busy for a few years” says Shirley.

The family moved to Germantown in 1971 and Shirley remained a “stay-at-home mom” until 1975 when she became employed as school secretary at Farmington Elementary. She stayed there until the last child graduated from college. By that time the daughters, Leslie and Tracy had married and the grandchildren started arriving. Shirley’s husband, Jim, was then Superintendent of Shelby County Schools, an appointed job which he held from 1985-1997. During this time, Shirley was able to devote time to and enjoy her four grandchildren. “I did a lot of volunteering work at church and Ronald McDonald House”. Jim also liked serving others and for two years they spent every Monday morning, in all kind of weather, serving breakfast to the homeless in a park in mid-town. “I felt so blessed to be able to do this” says Shirley.

Since moving to Kirby Pines in August 2014, Shirley has been constantly busy. Not long after moving to Kirby Pines, Jim began showing signs of declining health and Shirley devoted most of her time to caring for him. Jim’s move to the health care facilities here at Kirby motivated her to see the need for her services in those areas. Since Jim’s death two years ago, Shirley has devoted countless hours to activities for the residents there. In a more public light, Shirley is currently serving on the Advisory Committee, having formerly served as Wing Leader. You can see her in every resident entertainment venue, in the Blossom Shop and transporting residents from the health areas to Vespers every Thursday night. You might see her filing music in the “music closet” or assisting with memorial services. “I’m happy to transport or run errands for anyone who needs help”, says Shirley. Such a statement comes from a true servant!

Shirley is currently a member of Germantown Church of Christ. She was baptized at age 17 and has consistently been involved in all church activities. In Shirley’s own words, “I, like most people, have had hard times in my life, but GOD has gotten me through them. I believe He always will. Since Jim’s death, GOD has led me to many great people and so many opportunities to help others here at Kirby Pines. This is a great place to live. I thank GOD for blessing me with these opportunities and for all the others who serve in so many ways”.

Shirley Anderson is certainly an example of someone with a true servant’s heart. She, like many others at Kirby Pines provide in excess of 30,000 hours of volunteer service each year. We are truly blessed to have so many residents who devote their talents to making life better at Kirby Pines and so fortunate that Shirley and her husband, Jim, decided to make Kirby Pines their forever home.

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident, Kirby Pines

HAPPY AND JOYFUL

Nancy and Bill Douglas have had a successful life and marriage, recently celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. As faithful Christians, they believe that the greatest achievement and joy of their lives is “having raised three Christian children who have, in turn, raised five Christian grandchildren.”

Bill and Nancy moved with their dog “Chip” to Kirby Pines in November 2017 from Germantown, where they had lived their entire married life. They first met in 1957 when Nancy’s brother invited his friend Bill Douglas to their home to meet one of Nancy’s friends. Well, Nancy decided that she was “the one” for Bill. Nancy and Bill married on June 14, 1959.

Bill Douglas was born in Memphis in 1936. He attended Snowden Jr. and Central High Schools. He graduated from Memphis State University with a degree in Sales and Advertising and went to work immediately selling real estate. He first worked in sales of houses but later worked in commercial real estate selling such things as office buildings and hotels. Bill was recognized in “The Million Dollar Club” for having sold that amount in a year. He retired at age 65 after 42 years with Cooper Realty.

Nancy Pickering Douglas was born in Germantown in 1938. Nancy says she was blessed to be born into a Christian family. Being the only girl with two brothers, she became “a Daddy’s girl”. Her father’s premature death just weeks before her graduation from high school put Nancy into a deep depression for some time. Nancy attended Germantown High School and Memphis State University for one year. However, the non-academic world beckoned and so she was hired by MLG&W to work in the Records Department. When she “caught” Bill Douglas her life “took on a happy and joyful experience.”

Following their marriage, Bill and Nancy moved to Germantown. Their first son, William, was born 1 ½ years later. Sadly, 18 months later, an infant daughter, Elizabeth Ann, died after 3 days. “God needed her”, says Nancy but she experienced another period of depression with this loss. However, one year later, they were thrilled when their 2nd son, Joe, was born healthy and happy. They were equally thrilled when a daughter, Nancy Anne, was born 18 months later. Raising 3 children was a lively but pleasurable experience for Nancy. She says “The few bumps we had were easy to resolve”. Nancy, fortunately, was able to be “a stay at home mom” which allowed her to be involved in all the children’s activities, including the PTA. A testimony to Nancy’s loving role as a mother was presented to her on her 80th birthday. A book entitled “Making Memories” contained photos and quotes of love, appreciation and remembering fun times from her children, son and daughters-in-law and grandchildren. “We always had time for family vacations as well as just the two of us. Bill’s career afforded us the opportunity to have so many wonderful trips and interesting destinations”, says Nancy.

Although Nancy was busy as a homemaker she also was very involved in the Suburban Garden Club and Germantown Women’s Club. Bill became active in the Germantown Civic Club, the Optimist Club, Leadership Memphis, the Boy Scouts and served as President and Board Member of the Germantown Horse Show. Bill coached Little League, football and basketball, involving himself in all of his children’s activities. He also loved to fish, hunt and play golf in his “spare time”. At St. George’s Episcopal Church, Bill helped start the first Adult Bible Class, served on a committee to train and direct the Acolytes and was Chairman of the Ushers. Nancy and Bill are now members of Faith Anglican Church where Bill serves as an Usher and Nancy helps with Oblations.

Since moving to Kirby Pines, Bill has been involved in the Garden and Ham’ateur Clubs. In 2018, Bill and Nancy took on the role of Mr. & Mrs. Santa Claus in the annual Christmas Eve Program at Kirby Pines. Nancy continues to play golf frequently. Most importantly, she has quietly assumed the role as a helper to many residents who need assistance. When Bill and Nancy moved to Kirby Pines, they became next-door neighbors to 99-year-old resident, Virginia Granger. Nancy says “Virginia became one of the best friends I ever had. We loved each other immediately. She truly blessed my life”. Unfortunately, Virginia’s recent death has left a big void in Nancy’s life.

However, both Bill and Nancy have stated that their lives continue to be blessed since moving to Kirby Pines. “This is a joyful time in our lives. We have met and feel so close to so many of the residents. Now, we have a much larger and wonderful family of beautiful people. We have always loved people and wanted to help others”, say Nancy and Bill. Because of their personalities and helping nature, Bill and Nancy Douglas are a wonderful “fit” for our Kirby Pines family and are an example for all of us.

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident, Kirby Pines

A BLESSED LIFE

November is the month in which we as a nation pay special tribute to the veterans of the armed services and their families. We have many veterans who live at Kirby Pines and we are thankful every day for their sacrifices. This is the story of one of them, Dr. Thomas Hickey.

Tom has many titles: doctor, psychologist, professor, businessman, musician, father and veteran. He has had a full life with challenges and tragedies. But, in Tom’s words, “I have lived a blessed life”. Tom was born and grew up in Jonesboro, Arkansas. According to Tom, “You knew everybody and had the opportunity to experiment with almost everything”. He enjoyed being able to walk to the movies, see a double feature for a dime and enjoy a bag of popcorn for a nickel. Since both parents worked, Tom was left in the care of the maid who basically allowed Tom to live as a “free spirit”. Tom wonders how he survived all the mishaps of his childhood, remembering at age 6 being dared to drop a match in a vacant field. The nearby houses nearly caught fire. Fearing the worst, Tom ran home and hid under the kitchen stove. His parents were able to convince him that bad deeds have consequences. He remained good friends with his childhood friends for many years.

Tom inherited his musical talents from both parents. His father played all musical instruments except strings. His mother, a contralto, was in demand as a soloist. At the age of 17, Tom was invited to play in the Arkansas Symphony. Following graduation from high school, Tom enrolled at Northwestern University to study music. However, he fell in love with a girl from Dallas and decided to transfer to SMU to work on a business degree. When he graduated with a BBA, the Korean War was going on and he enlisted in the Navy. He was selected to play in the Navy Band and spent 4 years in Washington, D.C. and New York City. Being in the band was demanding but also afforded Tom the opportunity to meet professional musicians as well as obtain free tickets to all events. In NYC he had encounters with such stars as Ethyl Merman and Judy Garland.

Tom wanted to marry but needed more income to support a family. He applied to OCS and was transferred to the Navy Supply Corps in Jacksonville, Florida. He married and had a son, James while stationed there.

Following discharge from the Navy, Tom moved with his family back to Jonesboro to take over his father’s advertising business. Becoming dissatisfied with a business life, he took advantage of the VA counseling services. They recommended a future in psychology. Tom took their advice and enrolled in psychology at Vanderbilt University, finishing with a PH.D in 4 years. Tom used this degree in several fields, first with a management consulting firm and later teaching at the University of Arkansas and Centenary College in Shreveport, Louisiana. It was here “during a mid-life crisis” that Tom and his wife divorced. Tom moved to the VA Hospital in Little Rock as a psychologist. At the VA, he fell “madly in love” with his co-therapist, Sherry Faulkner. However a great offer was made to become the Clinical Director of East Arkansas Mental Health Center. Tom accepted and moved to West Memphis, AR. While there, he served as President of the Arkansas Psychological Association and had the opportunity to introduce Bill Clinton at one of their meetings. In 1976, after 5 years of long range dating, Tom and Sherry married.

Following the cut of funds and closures of mental health centers, Tom was again seeking employment. An opportunity became available with the Memphis Police Department as they were seeking someone to set up psychological services. Of this, Tom says, “I never thought I would like working with cops so much, but they are a great bunch of guys. I did a little bit of everything from consulting with the Chiefs, counseled officers and their families, screen-tested new applicants, did crisis intervention and talked people down off the bridge. It was never dull”. In 1979, Tom’s son James was killed by a drunk driver and in 2016, on their 40th wedding anniversary, Tom’s wife Sherry died of ovarian cancer.

After retirement from the MPD, Tom became tired of living along and because he could not cook, investigated several retirement facilities. He chose Kirby Pines. “I made the right choice”, says Tom. Presently, Tom has 2 step-daughters who live nearby, 6 grandchildren (1 deceased) and 4 great-grandchildren. Tragedy struck again when Tom’s oldest grandchild, a grandson, died while running a marathon in Memphis. He had just graduated from law school and was looking forward to a clerkship with a Federal Appellate Judge.

Tom enjoys playing golf, bridge, poker, ping pong, trivia and especially his music. He continues to take saxophone lessons in Jazz. He plays the saxophone with The Memphis Wind Symphony and clarinet with Santifica, the band at St. George Episcopal Church and has entertained with both instruments at Kirby Pines. Also, Tom says, “I love to travel and have traveled extensively to all 50 states, Europe and South America. I continued to do testing for small police departments and security firms after my retirement from MPD but gave that up so I could travel”.

Thank you Tom for your service to our country, to our police department and for your decision to move to Kirby Pines. You have enriched our lives with your beautiful music and your warm and generous personality. We are blessed to have you at Kirby Pines!

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident, Kirby Pines

A Ray of Sunshine

Roll out the welcome mat! This is the current mantra of Barbara Logan. Although she says Kirby Pines is a friendly place, she would like to see more visiting and socializing in each other’s homes. “I think our homes offer an opportunity to really get to know each other better and to form special friendships”, says Barbara. To know Barbara is to feel that optimism and joy radiating from her. Perhaps this stems primarily from her strong faith in God. She currently worships with Germantown Presbyterian Church.

Barbara moved to Kirby Pines from Colorado Springs in 2016. She chose Kirby Pines over other places because of the “happy atmosphere” and the numerous opportunities to interact with other residents. Barbara quickly entrenched herself into all things Kirby and has formed many friendships. One of her friends said, “I was drawn to Barbara because she is always positive and I love her infectious laugh! Overall, she is a very fun friend”. When Barbara was asked what she liked most about living at Kirby, she replied, “I like Kirby because it is a happy place and I appreciate the excellent medical care I receive here”.

Certainly, many of Barbara’s characteristics were formed from her childhood. Born in a small town in Louisiana, life was hard but idyllic. Summers were spent climbing trees, riding bicycles and horses (bareback) and using her imagination to make up games to include as many children as possible. She recalls being talked into eating a green persimmon. One time was enough! Because both her father and mother were teachers/principals, there was no income during the summer months. Life was sustained with the family garden and a tight budget.

At the age of eleven, Barbara, along with her parents and younger sister, Elizabeth, moved to Ruston, Louisiana. It was here, at Louisiana Tech, Barbara graduated with a B.S. in Education and met the love of her life, Jim Logan, an art major. After marriage, their first move was to Nashville where Jim had a scholarship to the prestigious Vanderbilt George Peabody College. After graduation, Jim joined the U.S. Air Force.

Eventually, after living in various places, including outside the states, the family moved to Colorado Springs for Jim to serve at the Air Force Academy. Barbara always taught school wherever they lived, introducing her to a variety of challenges. During the midst of all this, two children, Whit and Cheryl, were added to the family. Barbara earned a Masters from University of Colorado while the youngest child was in college. Barbara is now grandmother to five grandchildren.

Barbara retired from teaching after 35 years. Her husband, Jim, retired after 20 years in the Air Force. “Just for the fun of it and because Jim was such an excellent watercolorist, we decided to open an art gallery”, says Barbara. While Jim painted all day, Barbara ran the gallery. “It was certainly a learning experience but fun”. Sadly, Jim passed away in 2000. Barbara continued living in Colorado until her move to Memphis and Kirby Pines. Her daughter lives close by in Collierville.

Barbara’s life has been very active. Living in various places and traveling the world has made her appreciate what she has. Life was never dull, from attending the Grand Ole Opry in Nashville, surviving five typhoons while living in Guam, becoming rabid tiger fans of LSU, jeeping in the jungles of Panama and the mountains of Colorado. She also fondly recalls entertaining 76 USAF officers and wives as well as having private showings of Jim’s paintings in their home. While in Guam, they hosted a student from Kusaie so he could obtain a high school diploma.

Of this, Barbara says, “Through this active life that we have lived as a family, we were so blessed with being able to find churches and groups of believers that helped us mature and realize the significance of our belief in Jesus Christ and the many times we have been rescued by a loving God.”

Barbara’s hobbies are reading, needlepoint, baking and having friends in for fun and fellowship. One of her needlepoint pieces of the nativity scene is beautifully framed and displayed in her home. She is certainly faithful in sending notes to others to thank them or to encourage them.

Hopefully, we can learn a lesson from Barbara – that our outlook on life is our own choosing and not the responsibility of others. We are so fortunate at Kirby Pines to have someone like Barbara who sets an example of sharing, service and hospitality.

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident, Kirby Pines

The Perfect Blend

A 50-year marriage, a unified faith in God and a desire to help others. Such describes Mary Ann and Roy Thurmond. Additionally, their philosophy of life is that relationships are more important than “the doings.” Yet, when one examines a short biography of their lives, the perfect blend of both of these elements emerge.

Mary Ann Faris grew up in Conway, Arkansas, where her father was a professor at Hendrix College, as well as a renowned author and photographer. Her mother, an elementary school teacher, wrote the scripts to accompany her father’s photographs. Together, they appeared in several national publications such as LIFE Magazine and The New York Times. When Mary Ann was 8 years old, her father was invited to photograph an art exhibit at Rohwer, one of the 10 internment camps set up to confine Japanese Americans after the bombing of Pearl Harbor. The photographs were published in a book, Beauty Behind Barbed Wire. Mary Ann continues today, along with her brother Tim, to share these photos through a traveling exhibit, compiled by an Arkansas State University history professor. The exhibit has been shown in several locations, including the Presidio in California and was written up in Memphis Magazine in March, 2017 when being on view at the Memphis Botanic Garden. Because of her parents’ influence, Mary Ann grew up with her own interest in writing and photography. She dedicated her life to Christ at a camp revival on Petit Jean Mountain in Arkansas at age 11.

Following graduation from Hendrix, Mary Ann held several positions with the Baptist Hospital System, first in Little Rock and later in Memphis. While working as Student Activities Director at Baptist School of Nursing, she had the opportunity to chaperone 3 planeloads of students who sang at various functions during the 1964 World’s Fair in New York City. She later accompanied 5 students to Berne, Switzerland for a Baptist Youth Conference. Mary Ann’s other employment included 5 years on the staff of Christ United Methodist Church and then as Administrative Manager/Partner for 30 years with a management consulting firm.

Mary Ann, who was still single at age 31, met Roy in 1968, a year following the death of his wife Alice who died at age 30. He was left with 2 small children, a boy and a girl, ages 1 and 3. Mary Ann and Roy dated only 3 ½ weeks before deciding to marry, surprising her parents who would then become sudden grandparents! Together they had another child, a daughter, and 50 years later, the 3 Thurmond children are all grown and living out-of-state. There are now 3 grandchildren, 3 step-grandchildren and 5 step-great-grandchildren.

Roy was born in his grandmother’s home in Columbus, Georgia. He has one sister, Reba, living in West Virginia. His mother was a seamstress and his father was treasurer of a textile mill. His father brought metal scraps home and made such things as wagons and even a roller coaster for their back yard. He spent his childhood playing football and basketball in backyards and on dirt courts. His height proved to be a real plus in helping his school win several championships in basketball. At the age of 11, Roy and his sister attended a church revival and dedicated their lives to Christ.

Roy attended Georgia Tech, majoring in civil engineering, but later transferring to management. Following graduation, Roy went into the Army National Guard for 6 months of active duty and then married his college sweetheart Alice. They moved to North Carolina where Roy worked at Burlington Industries as an accountant. Roy was active in the Jaycees, volunteering when they sponsored the Greater Greensboro golf tournaments. He also earned a CPA designation and moved his family to Memphis. Here he worked for an accounting firm and Union Planters Bank. Roy finished his professional career by working as a certified financial planner for J. H. Shoemaker and Co. for 25 years.

Roy’s love for bike riding has taken him on eleven 150-mile Multiple Sclerosis benefit rides, plus riding across 3 states. Following in his father’s footsteps, Roy became a “man of all trades” – able to fix almost anything. He has always loved helping people, even starting a ministry at their church called Helping Hands.

All through their marriage, Mary Ann and Roy have focused their energies around activities of their church, Christ United Methodist. Just a few highlights include Mary Ann’s being active in United Methodist Women and serving as President, Secretary, and email correspondent of the Lamplighter S.S. class. Roy, likewise is very active and enjoys ushering, as well. He participated on a Methodist District Disaster Response team. Their motto was “Have chain saw, will travel,” as they took tractors and their saws to clear devastated areas following severe storms.

So, what is next for this couple? Roy loves woodworking and repairing items. (Watch out, Roy, you are about to be bombarded with new friends!) Mary Ann loves growing flowers, learning Mahjong, line dancing, and writing; and, of course, working with her father’s photographs and continuing with the Rohwer story.

The Thurmonds feel strongly that God has a purpose for their lives and they know that fulfillment comes from that commitment. Kirby Pines has become their new home and they are very happy here, surrounded by such wonderful caring people and staff. A favorite quote of Mary Ann’s is “When a butterfly flaps its wings in South America, it affects the weather in Florida.” This means, according to Mary Ann, that we are all connected in some way and our actions, no matter how small, make a difference! She further states that “We have a deep gratitude for our past relationships and for our new ones here! God has blessed us to live among you, doing life together – and those are the ‘doings’ that count!”

Voices Brought Them Together

Janet Gail Lawson was born September 24, 1937 in Detroit, Michigan to Leighton and Jewell Lawson. She was the middle child of three girls. Her father owned three Mobil Oil stations and did quite well for the family when at the age of 37, he decided to become a full-time minister.

He enrolled in Freed-Hardeman College in Henderson, Tennessee, when Janet was five. After that, the family moved every few years, from Henderson to West Helena, Arkansas to Clinton, Oklahoma. The family eventually ended up in Memphis, where Janet enrolled at Treadwell High School. Though she was not thrilled with the move, things got easier when she got to sing in the senior choir as a freshman and met a cute senior named Gerald Reeves.

Gerald Lee Reeves was an only child, born February 7, 1936 in Memphis, Tennessee to Mattie Clarice and Edgar Reeves. His father worked for the Ford Tractor Company. Once Gerald was in high school at Treadwell, he became a frequent visitor at the Lawson home, which made Janet’s father a bit uneasy. It was decided that she would attend Harding Academy in Searcy, Arkansas her senior year. Gerald kept the spark alive, however, by driving to Searcy every other weekend to visit.

After graduation in 1954 from Treadwell, Gerald joined the Marines serving two years active duty and six years in the reserves. Janet transferred to Memphis State to take prerequisites for medical technology school and to be closer to Gerald. Gerald was also at the U of M, studying engineering.

Janet was accepted to Baptist Medical Technology School and fiercely pursued her dream of becoming a med tech. Two weeks after her graduation and four days before her birthday, she became Mrs. Gerald Reeves. On September 20, 1957, she was the first bride to walk down the aisle of the new Macon Road Church of Christ auditorium, where her father preached.

Gerald was working for an architect, who was working on an Exxon contract, when Exxon offered him a job, even before he completed his college degree. Gerald worked full time and went to school at night, while Janet worked at Baptist Memorial Hospital on Union Avenue, Blood Banking. In February of 1961, their daughter Karen was born and two and half years later in July of 1963, their son Bruce arrived. When the kids were born, Janet took a work hiatus.

In 1967, Exon moved Gerald and the family to Birmingham and to Mobile, Alabama. He played a significant role in developing Esso fuel stations along the Gulf Coast. Janet continued her career here at Baptist Montclair. In 1970, they moved back to Memphis, living in Germantown. They joined White Station Church of Christ where Janet prepared meals for those who were ill and bereaved and taught in the children’s program. Gerald distinguished himself for providing doughnuts and coffee for the joint Heirs Bible class for 40 years.

Janet retired in 1996 as a med tech at Baptist Central. Most of her 40-year career was spent there in heart surgery. During those years, she worked on blood coagulation and open heart and heart transplant surgeries. After she retired, they built a house on Pickwick Lake and practically went every weekend. Gerald was still working when Janet discovered her artistic talent. She took drawing lessons, then went with a small group to study art in France for three weeks. She got so good, that a friend who owned a car dealership they had met through church asked her to do a painting he could put in every car he sold. When the details were worked out, she agreed and painted for him for a year and a half. It was none other than Bud Davis. Janet made enough money to build a large art studio in their home.

In 2001 Gerald retired after 41 years at Exxon as a Senior Marketing Engineer. They traveled and spent time enjoying their lake house.

In 2017, they sold their home and moved to Kirby Pines. They looked at several communities, but Janet had already been attending the Book Baggers three years prior, and after meeting all the smart, interesting members of that group, she had made up her mind for the two of them. The one stipulation was they wanted the apartment they had seen two years prior in Memphis Magazine and it just happened to be available. It was simply meant to be, it was God’s will.

Since moving in, Gerald enjoys relaxing with their dog Coca and looking at their beautiful view from their balcony. Janet has taken up Mahjong and they both enjoy dancing. By now, you surely have met the Reeves, if not, they are two of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. They even sent me home with homemade cookies after our interview. Yum!

A Ministry of Love

An email arrives announcing that a resident of Kirby Pines has fallen or become ill. A request is made for prayers for the individual and his or her family. Eventually, another email arrives giving an update on the resident’s condition and location as well as a request for continued prayers and cards.

These emails go out from the email “tree” of Sydney Wagner to approximately 120 residents of Kirby Pines. Much of the information is given to Sydney by other residents; however, she follows up on information with personal visits or phone calls before sending out the updated information.

While honoring the privacy of the individual, Sydney believes “the more we know about each other, the more we will care and love each other”. She also believes the scripture that teaches, “The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much” (James 5:16). Her personal experiences in battling cancer 12 years ago and recently caring for her husband, Shelton during his terminal illness, have re-enforced with Sydney an awareness of the comfort brought to individuals and families when prayers are “showered” on them when they are needed most.

When did this ministry begin? While her mother was a six years resident of Applingwood Health Facility, Sydney and her sister wrote a monthly newsletter which was sent to all families and featured a write-up of a resident in each issue. While attending Highland Street Church of Christ, Sydney did a weekly newsletter for her Bible class and continued that at Germantown Church of Christ, until recently.

When Sydney and her husband Shelton moved to Kirby Pines in 2014, she had a desire to keep up with old and new friends and to learn more about them. So, she started sending messages to a few. Word spread and residents began requesting to be on her email list.
Sydney’s earlier life could be considered ideal and normal. She had a happy childhood, growing up on a farm with one brother and one sister. In addition to her parents and siblings, Sydney had a nanny whom she loved very much and was also fortunate to get to share a bedroom with her grandmother “who taught me everything I know”.

Sydney Juan Carmack was born in a hospital in Brownsville, Tennessee, on August 10, 1939. She was the first of three children born to Sidney and Juantena Carmack of Dry Hill, a community near Ripley, Tennessee. Her father was determined to name their first born for both parents. To his delight, the baby was a girl, but it was necessary to change the spelling of his name for her.

The little girl grew up and became an overachiever in Ripley High School. Sydney learned to play the trumpet, was a cheerleader for three years, and was co-editor of the school newspaper. To this day, she maintains contact with grammar and high school friends.

Following high school, Sydney attended Memphis School of Commerce, then worked six years for American Surety Company. But alas, she met the love of her life, Shelton Wagner. They were married on August 25, 1962. Almost two years later Wendy Leigh was born and 18 months later, Shelton Allen, Jr. completed their family. Shelton started his own business in drafting and this was continued for 40 years. During that time, Sydney supported the business by being the bookkeeper and courier.

In 1975, the family moved to East Memphis so it would be convenient for the children to attend Harding schools. The home was located in a cove and in Sydney’s opinion, they had “the best neighbors in the world”. There were frequent cove parties which added to their friendships. She recently was invited back to one of the parties and enjoyed seeing the small children, many now grown.

Throughout their marriage, Sydney and Shelton enjoyed traveling, seeing most of Europe, Canada and Mexico and all the states, except Hawaii. One of their three trips to Alaska was for two months with three other couples, traveling in two motor homes. The most fun they shared was taking each of their six grandchildren, at age 13, for a one week visit to a location of their choice in the U.S. Their choices were Alaska(2), New York City, Jackson Hole, Wyoming, Boston and the Grand Canyon.

Sydney believes that the second smartest thing she and Shelton ever did was to make the decision to move to Kirby Pines – the first was their accepting Jesus Christ as their Savior. She has made many wonderful new friends and gotten to know her old friends better. She enjoys the entertainment and all amenities provided at Kirby Pines. Her hobbies are reading, writing, photography, playing mahjong, and making her greeting cards to send out to others each month.

The “ministry of love” Sydney provides through her emails, newsletter and cards, her friendly and approachable personality make her an invaluable asset to our Kirby Pines family. Thank you, Sydney for keeping us informed about each other and for making Kirby Pines a more loving place.

Written by Joan Dodson, Kirby Pines Resident

Modesty with a Splash of Humor

A large section of the restaurant was filled with people awaiting the arrival of the “surprise” guest, Bob Shears. The occasion was the celebration of Bob’s 84th birthday, arranged by his step-daughter, Carol Turner. Carol’s devotion to her “step-dad” is obvious by such acts and by the frequent visits she makes to Kirby Pines to visit him.
Each year in June, fathers and grandfathers are honored on a special Sunday. Many men become step-fathers and are successful in being good role models for the children and grandchildren involved. Such is the case of Bob Shears.

At the age of 18, Bob married Charlene Winsett. She had a son whom Bob adopted. Bob and Charlene had one child who died at birth. They were married for 23 years until Charlene’s death.

In 1975, Bob married Sue Treadway and became the step-dad to Carol and her brother, Richard Treadway. Bob and Sue had 43 years together before Sue died from complications of dementia. Bob was Sue’s caregiver 24/7 as long as he could care for her. From his marriage to Sue, Bob has two grandchildren and five great-grandchildren who affectionately call him “Papa Bob”.
A native Memphian, Bob was the only child born to Elsie and Jack Shears. His parents divorced when Bob was quite young. Despite this, Bob says he had a happy childhood. He had a wonderful grandmother who was a great influence on his life. After Bob was grown, his mother Elsie married Franklin “Dutch” Schroer. Bob remains good friends with his step-dad who is now 95.

In 1952, Bob graduated from Humes High along with, soon to be famous, Elvis Presley. Bob and Elvis remained friends for many years. During high school and following graduation, Bob served in the U.S. Air Force Reserve for a total of eight years. During this time he attended the University of Tennessee and Memphis State University. His first job was auditor for a major department store. Because his job involved travel, Bob made the decision to enter the credit union industry.

In 1997, Bob retired with 28 years of executive experience in various credit unions in Memphis. Those credit unions were for International Harvester, First South Financial Federal (formerly the Navy Base), and The Commercial Appeal. In addition, Bob served as President of the Memphis Chapter of Credit Unions and President of the Tennessee Credit Union Society.

Bob moved to Kirby Pines in May, 2018. His step-father, “Dutch” Schroer, a member of the Discovery Club, had a great influence on Bob’s decision. Previously, Bob lived in a spacious lake-front home in Snow Lake Shores, Mississippi, an incorporated community with approximately 300 homes. When Bob and Sue retired in 1997, they were already living “the good life” there, on “the most beautiful lake in Northern Mississippi. Both Bob and Sue loved to travel and they traveled the world, seeing much of it from the 40 cruises they enjoyed. They were active members of Ashland Methodist Church. Bob continues there and serves as Chairman of Finance and also the Board of Trustees.

After living at Snow Lake Shores for 22 years, Bob decided his experience and leadership skills were needed to make Snow Lake Shores a better place so in 1997, he ran for Mayor and was elected. As Mayor, Bob established a police department and a court system. Through grants, he upgraded the voluntary fire department by having 50 fire hydrants installed as well as replacing the outdated water system. However, after four years, Bob decided to get out of politics but did remain on the Planning Committee.

Bob Shears loves dancing, card games (BEWARE, he is a card shark) and the occasional meal at Tunica with his step-father, Dutch. His love of dancing began at the age of seven when his mother who also loved dancing, took Bob to dances with her. His job was to dance with the ladies who had no partners. Since moving to Kirby Pines, Bob has been responsible for the revival of ballroom dancing. Due to his efforts, a larger group of residents are able to meet twice a week to learn and/or sharpen their dancing skills.

Bob says he enjoys living at Kirby Pines although he misses his former friends, pontoon boat, cat Charlie and all the outdoor activities he enjoyed at Snow Lake Shores. The things he enjoys most about living at Kirby Pines are the number of good friends he has made and the many activities available. “There is always something to do” says Bob. Certainly, he has quickly involved himself in the activities at Kirby. His friendly smile, gentlemanly manner, experience and willingness to help others have made him a “go-to” person. He is truly an asset to our Kirby Pines family.

Thanks to all who are fathers, grandfathers and step-fathers, for your influence and guidance and for making families complete. For those of us who had wonderful fathers, we are thankful for the memories.

Written by Joan Dodson, Resident

Modesty with a Splash of Humor

Betty Jane Gaia was born June 24, 1925 at St. Joseph’s Hospital in Memphis, Tennessee. Her father, Louis Leo Gaia, worked in the grocery business until the Depression, when they lost everything. He eventually gained employment with the Illinois Central Railroad as a switch-man and got the family back on their feet.

Her mother, Bettye Chambliss Gaia, raised her and her brother, Herbert, until the start of WWII, when she became “Rosie the Riveter” working on airplanes and eventually became a practical nurse.

Betty attended grade school at Immaculate Conception in midtown Memphis, then transferred to Southside High School. She worked for an ice cream parlor her junior and senior year and was active in several sports and clubs, but her real talent was showing up the boys as a member of the Rifle Team. According to Betty, she can still hit her mark!

After high school, she went to the Miller Hawkins Business College to study secretarial administration. She went to work for Campbell Clinic as a doctor’s assistant. One of those doctors, Dr. George Higley, opened his own practice and brought Betty with him. She assisted with everything from taking appointments to helping with X-rays, all of which she enjoyed very much.

During this time, Betty was a member of Boulevard Baptist Church where a young man named James Alvin Moore caught her eye. James, better known as Jimmy, had returned to Memphis after being stationed in Attu Island, Alaska. He was a Navy Sea-bee, building runways for two years – he did not enjoy it and was never one to hide that fact, even years later, Betty chuckles.

While Betty joined her friends at a party, Jimmy was singing in a trio. According to Betty, he wasn’t much of a singer, but he sure was cute. He asked her out and two years later, they were married – February 24, 1950.

The newlyweds moved in with Betty’s parents while Jimmy attended Med School at Memphis State, to save money. He went to work for a doctor who worked out of a duplex on South Lauderdale, and when that doctor decided to give up his practice, Jimmy took over and they moved into the other side of the house to start a family.

When Betty became pregnant with their first child she quit her job to become a homemaker. Their daughter Connie was born in 1953, son Barry in 1956 and then Glenn in 1957. Eventually, Jimmy moved his practice, as well as moving the family to a house on East McKellar. He partnered with Dr. Bill Metzger to start the Family Physicians Group on Winchester Road.

When the kids were grown, Betty decided to get her LPN and attended St. Joseph’s Nursing School in 1970. She worked a couple of years in Coronary Care at St. Joe, where she received her RN and was her class salutatorian. She then decided to go to Memphis State where she studied every “ology” she could get her hands on. She finally finished school in 1975.

While Jimmy’s practice was going strong, Betty volunteered at Methodist South for 14 years and then at Baptist Collierville the last 20. She still goes every Tuesday, stationed at the front desk, where her role is to make you feel comfortable and at ease – a job for which Betty feels she was made to do.

Throughout the years, the Moore’s did their share of traveling, taking ski trips to Winter Park, Colorado and visiting the Grand Canyon and Hoover Dam. Betty and Jimmy were even invited to London, England with the Memphis Cheerleaders, as Jimmy acted as their attending physician. Betty also went to the Smokies every year with the ladies from her church.

Jimmy developed Alzheimer’s and retired at 80 years old. He went to Page Robbins Adult Day Center in Collierville. Betty said it was a wonderful place and speaks very highly of the center. He passed away in 2009, and Betty remained in their house for several years until a bout of vertigo scared her enough to make a change. Her youngest son, Glenn, looked all over the area and in 2016, Betty moved to Kirby Pines.

Betty says she keeps to herself, but is a member of the Kirby Pines Photo Club and is taking Mahjong Classes with Jody Sosh. She is also joined at Kirby by her sister-in-law, Lou Moore, who lives in a Garden Home and her niece, Cheryl, is the Life Enhancement Director. She also plays Scrabble with friends on the computer and says she “holds her own” – even though she didn’t want me to print that – a little inside joke between us.

If you have yet to meet Betty, despite her self-described shyness, she is simply a delight with a wonderful sense of humor and a kindness she tries to hide. So, thank you, Glenn, for helping your Mom join our Kirby Pines family.

A LOVE OF MUSIC & “HER KIDS”

Marilyn Anita Mitchell was born March 25, 1932 in Memphis, Tennessee. Her father, Chester Mitchell, was a traveling salesman with the William R. Moore Dry Goods company. Her mother, Mary, was a church secretary until Marilyn was born and remained a homemaker, having two more children – a girl and a boy – until Marilyn and her siblings were out of school.

Marilyn graduated from Humes High School in 1950 – three years before Elvis. During that time, she worked at Goldsmith’s and did some local modeling downtown at places like the Tea Room and Gerber’s. She continued her education at Southwestern – now known as Rhodes College – where she studied English.

Marilyn admittedly “had a ball” while attending Southwestern. She was President of Kappa Delta sororiety, she was Homecoming Queen, she was on the Beauty Court for three years (an honor she chuckles at now) and she was even voted the April Fool’s Queen – no joke! But she also had her eye on a young man who went by the name, Red.

Milton Leroy “Red” Wray was born in Jackson, Mississippi on February 2, 1926. He enlisted in the Navy during World War II and became a pilot. After his time was served, he decided to go back to school. With the Millington Naval Base close by, he just happened to land in Memphis attending Southwestern.

Red was a member of the Sigma Nu fraternity and Marilyn had seen him on campus and at parties. He was six years older than she, but that didn’t stop Marilyn from holing up at the library when she knew he would be there. It was during a school basketball game where Red spotted her and asked if he could give her a ride home. Marilyn accepted and when he dropped her off, he asked her for a date. Once again, she said yes.

The two continued to date, even after Red went to get his MBA at the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania. He traveled back and forth, they wrote letters and became engaged. He returned to Memphis just three days before their wedding on February 20, 1954. Marilyn graduated from Southwestern that same year.

March 1, 1954, Red started work at Peat, Marwick, Mitchell & Company in accounting with tax day being March 15th at the time. The following fall, Marilyn took her first job as a sixth grade teacher at Sherwood Elementary, shaping the minds of 39 students in her classroom. She had no idea that teaching was to become her passion. She remained two years and transferred to Presbyterian Day School for the next five. She got pregnant in 1960 when she decided to get her Masters in Education at Memphis State. Red had begun working on his CPA license.

In 1961, William Andrew Wray was born and Marilyn received her Masters. She became a stay at home mom and two-and-a-half years later came daughter, Lynda. The twelve years Marilyn took care of the children, she also taught Bible school, was a member of her church choir (which she did for 70 years), was the President of Maternal Welfare, was a member of Les Passees and was a charter member of Subsidian.

In 1973, the kids were older and Marilyn went back to teaching fifth grade, this time at ECS (Evangelical Christian School). The next year, she was asked to take the position of Principal of Elementary, to which she gladly accepted. She remained as such for 30 more years.

The family was very involved at Second Presbyterian Church, the kids played tennis, Red left the accounting firm to teach at University of Memphis, William and Lynda became valedictorian of their respective classes ’79 and ’82, and Red eventually opened his own firm. When he was asked his occupation, his reply was “I work for Marilyn and the kids”. He partially retired in 2000.

Marilyn retired in 2004 and was given a 2003 sage green Mercury Sable and a rocking chair from ECS. She drove the car for 12 years and still has the chair. In 2009, Marilyn moved to Kirby Pines. The Wrays had known Jimmy Latimer, Charlie Trammell and Rudy Herzke through church and family attending ECS, so they were already familiar with the community. Red passed away in August of 2016 after 62 years of marriage.

Marilyn still loves living at Kirby. She has been on the Advisory Board, was President of the Resident Association for two years, volunteers for numerous activities, is now president of the Ham-ateur Club and even works in the Blossom Shop. She has made many great friends over the years and is always taken aback when she drives in and through the beautiful Kirby campus.

Marilyn is simply a pleasure to be around. Her favorite verse from the Bible sums up her life beautifully; 3 John 1:4, I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.